Wednesday, December 30, 2009

#1 of Fleur's 10 Best

From 10 to 1 so much has been reviewed, and _so_ much left out. Where, you might ask, is the evidence of last year's infamously non-committal epic romance? And what, you might wonder ever became of trophy-wife syndrome? Why didn't "Can you really get your Jackie O. on" make the cut? Impossible to touch each and every hand we've held here in this abridged collection, so please stay tuned to see what the new decade brings!

In the meantime, remember way back when, when we decided the appropriate closing to a formal letter one wanted to end in vitriol (but for legal reasons determined it was prudent to not) was "Best Regards"? Quickly taking its place in common parlance from office emails to briefly dashed off notes to one's child's over-priced pre-school, "Best Regards" spread a certain secret sunshine in the hearts of all who employed it until one day when texting to twitter Fleur declared "cool--thanx" is the new "Best Regards." While not in any sense declaring this is the all-time best thing Fleur has ever overwrought, this next post takes our #1 spot primarily for its hint of what's to come: the metaphysics of passion, the secret lives of the hyper-organized, and your personal decadence, to name but a few! ;)

Dear Fleur, I’m not sure how to rehab my “cool--thanx” image which in recent weeks has been sacrificed on the altar of desperately trying to attract the attention of someone who I’ve now concurred is obviously ‘just not that into me,’ to coin a phrase. Please help! ~Sugar

Dear Sugar,
Obviously, you need to gain an understanding of the difference between the dominant Newtonian thought model and the delightfully jumbled systems thinking model that is called for in most every situation beyond seventh grade science: single cause with predictable effect is so old school. Flow, change direction, pounce on and over freely and you will be embracing the orgiastic thinking of true creativity. Stop pouring over the details of what happened between Austin and Newark. Don’t stop, however, wearing those nude heels with everything. You know the ones. They are the little dot on the exclamation point of your independence.

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